Liked it!

1] I would have done Speed Ramps with motion blur for trip through Hall with "woosh" sounds.

2] Maybe I would have left out the puking? . . .

3] Coming from inside to outside was a minor colour change

4] LOVED the double-take of the kid after you pass her - after the puke!!!

5] I'd have had loads more close-ups. There were plenty of opportunities.

6] The piece was too long and with tighter and with loads more shots this would have made a well thought out (please say it was) quite punchy.

7] Oh yeah, I'd have cut the embarrassing-stilted-dance stuff. I actually cringed!

8] I like the concept of time passing, that worked for me. AND the joke about NOT going for the Pizza. Again this worked for me, not sure this is what "they" want on their website . . ?

You had a great idea of what you wanted ( please say yes?) and went ahead and did it. Maybe, as this was a Fair, I'd have had far more spontaneous, face-to-face contact. More smiles and chuckles. This was seen by my number 4 above. Think about shooting for a story, but in these pieces think about shooting for the edit too, meaning what would be a great shot to have also. You DON'T have to use it, but somebody taking B-roll - or even same camera - when an artist takes quick sketches of a scene.

Well done!

Grazie

Serena and Grazie ~ really great comments from both of you. Originally the piece landed at 7m 30s and we edited it down to 6m 00s ~ but I really do see where another minute could be shaved off. After all was said and done, we too realized that we didn't feature happy faces - and I do think the speed shot indoors is still too long. We went back and forth over whether to keep the puking scene. John, the guy in front of the camera, loved it. His wife ... not so much :). To lose the puking scene would leave the pizza scene a little "unexplained". When John cleared the frame and that gal walked in looking back at him - I knew I had my shot :)... It may still come out, along with other edits before we really call this thing finished.

Thanks again - greatly appreciated!!!

--Kevin

As a casual watcher, just a couple of comments for what they are worth.

Yeah, the puking scene is funny if you are trying to dissuade people from enjoying the fair, but to me it gives a negative element to the rides and the food.

also, at the beginning when he buys his ticket, he looks upset. Like he is mad that he has to pay to get in. Here again, if you are promoting the fair, not a good way to start.

I got a little dizzy from the stop frame action. Shorten the exhibit by wooshing between vendors so the stop action does not make you so dizzy.

My 2 cents worth.

Wanted to add that I enjoyed the video other than my comments. Don't want to come across as completely negative. :)

Dave T2

After all was said and done, we are going to make one more edit-run through this piece, taking many of the suggestions here into account. I really appreciate those who have commented.

Laurence ~ if you'd be so kind as to remove the embedded video post that would be great, as that version will go offline within the next week or so.

--Kevin

The new, and what I believe to be the final version has been posted. Based on suggestions posted here and by others, I was able to shave another 1m 18s off, bringing the final cut down to 4m 42s.

For the record, this is not a commissioned piece ~ it's part of an video entertainment guide for Nevada County, California - and is meant to be silly, stupid and just plain fun. So, we felt comfortable leaving in the puking scene, but running through it a bit quicker in the final cut =^)

See: "Gold In The Foothills Presents ~ 2009 Nevada County Fair" here:
http://www.youtube.com/goldinthefoothills

Thanks again for your comments and suggestions ~ this was all very helpful!

(as of the time of this post YT is still processing the vid - so it may be low-res for another 20m or so)

I liked it - very nice -

How did you do the banner titles at the bottom of a few scenes in the Villa video also posted?

Thanks srode ... The bottom titles are a mix of ...

1 graphic image that I created in Adobe Fireworks that consists of the pink bar which starts at the very bottom of the screen then turns gradient to black with a 1 pixel gold bar stretching from the left "almost" all the way to the right. I made sure the gold bar didn't get in the way of our Gold In The Foothills screen ID in the lower right of the screen.

1 motion background (that's the blue animated section) using a stock background clip from somewhere like FootageFirm's Video Blocks.

2 generated media text blocks ... one with the person's name overlaid above the motion background, and other with their job title overlaid above the pink bar.

When the full effect is stacked in a time line it consumes 4 tracks, top-to-bottom:
text-1
text-2
pink bar
motion background

Thanks for asking =)

--Kevin

Kevin, much better. I would still cut out more, but that's me.

Here are 2, the first 2, further points you might consider . . . . I know, I'm a real PITA! . . . But I also have solutions, initially in the form of PDFs I have generated for your thoughts/consideration . . .

1] I counted 2 places I felt needed colour correction. At 2:58 you could apply a wee bit of CC, 'cos at present his skin goes from "natural" to "blue" then back to natural. Look at the bloke in the background at 3:06? His skin is almost the same colour as the one of the blue T-ware bowls John bought. (I'm sending you PDF of before and after)

2] Some of the "face" shots could have done with a bit of a "pop"? Next time. But even if you had used the Bump Map option and highlighted just John's face it would have produced a great impression of his facial reaction, see 00:17. Presently the "joke" is lost? (I'm sending you PDF of before and after)

3] Still not keen on the amount/time-length of jerkiness on the sped-up footage.

Great stuff! If you need any more feedback, email me, I have the PDFs ready for your consideration. As it happens, I've done this for many Vegas Forum users now and we've all enjoyed the interaction.

Best regards

Grazie