1
Need Honest Criticism X2
Former user
wrote on 7/4/2014, 11:49 AM
Comments
Tim Stannard
wrote on 7/4/2014, 1:41 PM
I'm no tutorial maker, but as someone who is more likely to use a tutorial like this than make one my comments are:
Both films have exactly the same weaknesses: They give you a story of someone putting some kit together and then show the finished article.
I would want to see the following:
1. Open with the finished article - what we are trying to achieve
2. Show the components clearly (we don't need to see you take them out of the bag - a good clear shot of all the unassembled components laid out neatly enables the viewer to check they have all the parts.If need be show close ups of some of the parts.
3. Name the parts (captions and voiceover)
4. Show the construction mainly from one angle and if you need to change angle make it very clear what the new angle is. (The overhead might have been useful for showing the parts laid out, but other than that it didn't really add anything - I'm all for variety of shots but sometimes that can be a distraction in tutorials.
5. make sure that the fitting of components and any tightening or adjusting is well lit and in closeup. In both films the actual interesting bits (how the clamps/screws/whatever fit together were in the background (eg CineMoco 30s, Daylight Diffusion - 11-16s, and at 26s you mask what you are doing with your body! You then change to a reverse angle but you have moved your body so you again mask the action!)
I would definitely suggest you want a voiceover explaining what you are doing and possibly captions for any jargon or just to name parts.
Take a look at this
which was going to form part of a mini amateur documentary about a local building. The guy doing the work is clearly great at explaining his craft in layman's terms and despite having to shoot some of it under a blue tarpaulin, the guy filming captured all the important shots. Consequently the film almost edited itself. It's not really a tutorial and as such it fails as it doesn't explain the tools and materials, but nevertheless I think it gives a very clear explanation of the process.
Both films have exactly the same weaknesses: They give you a story of someone putting some kit together and then show the finished article.
I would want to see the following:
1. Open with the finished article - what we are trying to achieve
2. Show the components clearly (we don't need to see you take them out of the bag - a good clear shot of all the unassembled components laid out neatly enables the viewer to check they have all the parts.If need be show close ups of some of the parts.
3. Name the parts (captions and voiceover)
4. Show the construction mainly from one angle and if you need to change angle make it very clear what the new angle is. (The overhead might have been useful for showing the parts laid out, but other than that it didn't really add anything - I'm all for variety of shots but sometimes that can be a distraction in tutorials.
5. make sure that the fitting of components and any tightening or adjusting is well lit and in closeup. In both films the actual interesting bits (how the clamps/screws/whatever fit together were in the background (eg CineMoco 30s, Daylight Diffusion - 11-16s, and at 26s you mask what you are doing with your body! You then change to a reverse angle but you have moved your body so you again mask the action!)
I would definitely suggest you want a voiceover explaining what you are doing and possibly captions for any jargon or just to name parts.
Take a look at this
which was going to form part of a mini amateur documentary about a local building. The guy doing the work is clearly great at explaining his craft in layman's terms and despite having to shoot some of it under a blue tarpaulin, the guy filming captured all the important shots. Consequently the film almost edited itself. It's not really a tutorial and as such it fails as it doesn't explain the tools and materials, but nevertheless I think it gives a very clear explanation of the process.
JackW
wrote on 7/4/2014, 2:20 PM
In addition to Tim's excellent analysis, I would add this: who are your "tutorials" aimed at? What is the audience? High school kids in a media class; trade school students; people who have bought these products and are trying to assemble them, etc.? Your approach will be slightly different for each group.
Then ask yourself "what does this device, or these instruments, do?" Your first tutorial (in an earlier post) showed three point lighting, but never showed the result of doing this. So I'm left with the question of why I should be using three lights and what the person or object lit with three lights should look like.
Why should I be using a huge diffusing medium in an outdoor shoot? What does a person look like before using the diffuser, what do they look like after using it?
Think like the recipient of your tutorial. I take a tutorial, even if it's only a minute long, because I want to learn something. You as the teacher have only succeeded if I come away from the tutorial saying "Ah, that's how you do it," or "O.K., now I understand why you do it that way.
Go on line and look at other tutorials, especially those done by product manufacturers, to see how others tackle this problem. And good luck; keeping learning and working at it.
Take a look at these:
and this -- 
-- and 
Jack
Then ask yourself "what does this device, or these instruments, do?" Your first tutorial (in an earlier post) showed three point lighting, but never showed the result of doing this. So I'm left with the question of why I should be using three lights and what the person or object lit with three lights should look like.
Why should I be using a huge diffusing medium in an outdoor shoot? What does a person look like before using the diffuser, what do they look like after using it?
Think like the recipient of your tutorial. I take a tutorial, even if it's only a minute long, because I want to learn something. You as the teacher have only succeeded if I come away from the tutorial saying "Ah, that's how you do it," or "O.K., now I understand why you do it that way.
Go on line and look at other tutorials, especially those done by product manufacturers, to see how others tackle this problem. And good luck; keeping learning and working at it.
Take a look at these:
and this -- -- and Jack
John222
wrote on 7/4/2014, 3:24 PM
Link 1 - Get yourself out of the shot. It would be best to assemble it on a table top and only see hands rather than seeing a middle aged guy crawling around the floor.
Link 2 - Background is very distracting. Leads me to expect you to demo something like a lighting technique, but your not. You just putting together a diffusion panel.
Link 2 - Background is very distracting. Leads me to expect you to demo something like a lighting technique, but your not. You just putting together a diffusion panel.
Serena Steuart
wrote on 7/4/2014, 7:03 PM
Seems to me that neither assembly was completed under 60 seconds and there is nothing magical about the video lasting only a minute. Your theme seems to be that this gear can be assembled on site quite quickly, which is the sort of thing the manufacturers would like to be understood. But you are not the manufacturer or supplier (I presume), so what is the purpose of these videos? I think you might not have identified that purpose, other than the catch cry "under one minute".
Steve Mann
wrote on 7/5/2014, 12:09 PM
First - You are on to something. I sometimes like a short instructional video, but as good as the music is, I need to hear a narration.
Like others, I find the background of the second video to be distracting. Do it in a park with a less cluttered background. The transitions are EXTREMELY distracting and together waste a few seconds. In this video you need some close-up cutaways. I watched your backside for five seconds while you were doing something to the gear that I couldn't see.
The same in the first video - frequently all I saw was your hands with something under them being assembled. If this is a table-top dolly, then assemble it on a tabletop.
Narration. It's called "Show and Tell" for a reason.
Like others, I find the background of the second video to be distracting. Do it in a park with a less cluttered background. The transitions are EXTREMELY distracting and together waste a few seconds. In this video you need some close-up cutaways. I watched your backside for five seconds while you were doing something to the gear that I couldn't see.
The same in the first video - frequently all I saw was your hands with something under them being assembled. If this is a table-top dolly, then assemble it on a tabletop.
Narration. It's called "Show and Tell" for a reason.
Serena Steuart
wrote on 7/6/2014, 8:24 PM
Good on you, Apple Jax. Keep at it.
Byron K
wrote on 7/7/2014, 3:52 PM
One minute tutorials is a good concept.
Not really a criticism but more of an observation, the titles are little misleading, I thought that the kit could be assembled in a minute. The video would cut to another section of assembly w/ the previous section already completed which I know would take longer than a minute to complete. This needs to be explained or viewers will be put off. You know youtubers are critical of this kind of misleading info. (:
Keep up the good work AJ!
Not really a criticism but more of an observation, the titles are little misleading, I thought that the kit could be assembled in a minute. The video would cut to another section of assembly w/ the previous section already completed which I know would take longer than a minute to complete. This needs to be explained or viewers will be put off. You know youtubers are critical of this kind of misleading info. (:
Keep up the good work AJ!
VMP
wrote on 7/7/2014, 3:56 PM
Byron K +1
I too thought that the video was about a kit that is assemblable under one minute.
VMP
I too thought that the video was about a kit that is assemblable under one minute.
VMP