Ordered some memory on-line on 12th August using Dell's Service Tag system which according to Dell "Entering the service tag of your Dell computer or peripheral helps Dell deliver solutions tailored to the products you own. Your Service Tag is a unique five- to seven- digit alphanumeric (letter and number) code, which is found on a white bar-coded label affixed to your Dell computer or peripheral."

The memory was eventually delivered (that's another story) on 18th but was obviously the wrong memory for my PC. So I completed Dell's on-line 'Problems after Delivery' form and waited for a response. No response so on the 19th I went through the same process and got the same result. NOTHING!

So at 09:14 this morning I telephoned Dell. After selecting the most appropriate department (problem with your order after delivery) from the options menu my call was answered quite quickly by a lady in the 'Home and Office' department.

She asked for my Dell Order number, Service Tag number, my name, address and what my problem was. After I gave her the information and explained my problem she told me she would have to transfer me to their 'Small Business' department.

They asked for my Dell Order number, Service Tag number, my name, address and what my problem was. After I gave them the information and explained my problem they told me they would have to transfer me to their 'Technical Support' department.

They asked for my Dell Order number, Service Tag number, my name, address and what my problem was. After I gave them the information and explained my problem they told me they would have to transfer me to their 'Customer Care' department.

They asked for my Dell Order number, Service Tag number, my name, address and what my problem was. After I gave them the information and explained my problem they told me they would have to transfer me to their 'Technical Reception'. I explained that I was by now getting a little frustrated of being passed from pillar top post, being asked the same questions over and over, only to be told that I had been put through to the wrong department and that they would have to transfer me. So this time the gentleman said that before putting me through he would pass all the relevant information to whoever he was putting me through to so that I wouldn't need to give it all again.

So the guy in Technical Reception eventually answers and asks me what my problem is. So after telling him he tells me that he needs to put me through to 'Customer Services'

They asked for my Dell Order number, Service Tag number, my name, address and what my problem was. After I gave them the information and explained my problem they told me they would have to transfer me to their 'Small Business' department.

By now I was having fits of uncontrollable laughter each time I was asked for the Dell Order Number and Service Tag number and was getting bruised from bouncing off each of Dell's Customer Department walls.

To top it off (and cut a very long story short) after spending 67 minutes on the telephone I was told that Dell don't have a returns process for Small Businesses and that I must have ordered the wrong memory. They can't guarantee that the Service Tag number will identify the PC correctly and it's up to the customer to check that.

Rant Over