Hey thanks a lot Jim,
I really appreciate your interest and feedback. I am not sensetive about my work and don't mind any advise as long is it is in the general interest of improving both my skills and the video.

I agree with your suggestions 100% I had thought both the same things many times myself. I might change both and republish if I can get these others finished up first. T
he reason I left them in.
The Crucifixion: I added it at the last minute because I wanted people to get what the alteranative could be and express where I am coming from...
The Odd People floating in the backround: I wanted to leave it up to the veiwer to understand their meaning. You figured it out. In my mind they are representing ....everyone.

Yes I did the titles in Pro Titler. (obviously not the media... I shot that). I too had no idea what was involved in doing it but gave it a go and found that it was very easy and worth it.
It had always bothered me that there was no way (to my knowledge at that time) to make your titles move. I figure if the titles are super (they could be a lot better) then maybe someone would stick around long enough to watch the rest of the video, you know? It lets peolple know 'hey this isn't some random junk'.

Anyways, thanks again!

take care,

Josh

impressive. I started to understand the point after the part where he gets the clothes & the verse @ the end concluded it nicely.

did you base the movie on the verse (what it seems like) or did you make the movie & then notice how it fit with the verse.

EDIT: I agree @ the crusificaton @ the end. Seems out of place. Would of been more "in place" place if it was done by you.

Not a bad effort at all. A good cinematic eye and nicely produced. Rather 20s noir. A good idea. I suggest its natural ending is when the old chap falls to the ground in the cemetery -- stuff after that detracts. I found the masks a problem (old man and the devil, whom I think more effective not revealed). In terms of the message, that tells me that running after money is a bad thing and it is better to stay sitting on the park bench. I think the faces on the buildings are telling me that chasing after money makes one ignore others. But those others are just images. Are they observing his chase? What is their significance? Are they examples of more benevolent lives, or of people who are stuck and can't chase after the money. The symbolism might have been stronger if they were people being put aside, or if the character reacted to the images.
As a short film I think it successful and well done. Ending where I suggest gives it a closing impact, and I suggest it is better to let the viewer deduce the nature of the money giver. Do you achieve your overall intention? There I'm not sure. Are you saying that working is a bad thing, leading only to death and damnation? The young man doesn't achieve very much it seems, just some clothes, a car(?) and somewhere to live; like the people in the images. We don't see how he has used his money; might have given it to charities. I think the film lives without answering such questions; each viewer will take away their own interpretation, but that may not be the one you intend. Perhaps your other films in the group provide answers to these questions (e.g. alternatives to working for personal success).

i felt the film was very straightforward with what happened but I suspect he (ice) had a specific message in mind & was targeting people who would understand that message and used visuals to put that message out. Similar to how a michael moore "documentary" would work, not how armageddon would work.

I like your idea on the images: if they were actual people that he ignored (someone who needed help, asking for spare change, didn't hold the door open for some, etc) it would of had MORE impact. Unless they wearn't meant to represent people the character ignores. If they wearn't then I'm not sure who they were either (but it did look pretty sweet in many shots. Eyes in the puddle = genius!)

Josh good job on this film I liked it very much! I have only one thing I would say about the message of the film. I think if it was me I would have put some flashes(if that makes sense) of the cross or God something like that through out the film so you could see the character was making a choice between God and Money. Other than that I loved it. I work as a missionary here in Ukraine and we have our Video ministry here where we makeour own Vids I would not hesitate at all to show this film to people here. By the way I liked it that there was Russian in the title. You don't see that to often.
Daryl

Hello and thank you all for taking the time to watch the video and respond here. It means a lot to me!

Honestly I am very excited by all of your responces. After seeing the video hundres of times while editing I came to think "who the heck is gona actually watch this crap?". (have any of you ever felt this about your films?). So to hear some of you feed back is very encouraging.

Frankly, with out going into every question or suggestion, I agree with all of your comments and greatly appreciate them. I had thought many times about the same thing and now realize I should have listed to myself (if that makes any sense).

As far as the photos in the backround I was trying to convey the sadness of the many people who dedicate their entire lives to getting a job and money and various material things and in return get nothing but death. As if the people in the photos were already dead and watching him do as they did (?). And to, in any way convey the reality and saddness of this young man (my little brother).

I realize that most people won't get this. I don't mind if they find another meaning in the video. I think the basic premise is pretty clear. I almost took the photos out but thought that they were really creepy and just had to leave 'em.

I think that you will better understand where i am coming from and where i am going when I post the rest of the videos. They are made to be on a DVD together, each a seperate Ideas leading to one main Idea. I will mass produce this DVD and give it out freely when I leave for South America in 3 weeks.

I will really consider each of your comments and will hopefully make the video better and clearer. Like I said this is my first time with the software and camcorder and really, everything! I know that, like someone said the masks are pretty cheap and tacky and their are many other things that don't really look too cool but at 20 years old I know I have a lot to learn.

THANK YOU ALL AGAIN VERY MUCH and I encourage any more critisism.

Josh

Having some location audio mixed with the music would have helped.
Images on the walls etc don't track properly which distracts from some of the other high production values.
Some of the fast camera moves seemed to be causing problems with the encoding creating what looked like bad jump cuts on playback.

I'd suggest getting a copy of The DV Rebels Guide. It explains how to pull off a lot of action shots with no budget.

There's no shortage of good ideas in the movie so congratulations for the good bits and good ideas. As others have said the story isn't there. I've watched a lot of religiously themed movies, I used to do some work for Media Evangelism from HK. I know, they have huge budgets to work with however their storylines appealed to the general public enough to pack cinemas down here. They were mostly classic tragedies but they had something your story misses, redemption. Watching your movie I was totally lost, by the end I was left wondering if it should have been called "Predator Meets Wall Street", if you're going to use iconic characters you need to explain what they're doing in your story because after you revealed who the mystery masked character was and then cut to a scene of the Crucifixion I was well and truly lost as to what your intended story was.
Collaborating with others on your storyline should help you no end. Doing everything yourself is really hard, you can fall into many traps as you're too close to all of it to see the big picture, you tend to do things because you can rather than because they're what's needed to tell the story.

Certainly for a first effort not too shabby at all, you've got the right ideas, you just need to see the big picture more.

Bob.

I thought it was well done for your first effort!
The opening with the benches, moving from bench to bench showed time
being spent. I would have liked seeing the shadows move too exaggerating
the fact.

The images on walls, fantastic job. Perhaps follow with eyes as main character
passes by?

Low color levels and blown whites with diffusion, very nice effect.
Dark character perhaps blurred more or even a double role barely showing
the main character's face? One's own dark ambitions?

Can't wait for remaining releases.

Thanks you agian for the feed back.

Bob:
Your professional opionins and advise are always appreciated and welcomed. I, as you said, see that there is a great deal of things I need to learn in all aspects of Video. I won't re-iterate all you comments but they will help me in my next set of work. I like what you said about leaving in some real audio, would have been a nice touch. so many other things too...
I do think that it is understandable, though. From the feedback I have gotten (not only here) most people understand it. But your right, it is vague. I think that it wil be better understood when it is with everything else I am releasing in the near future. It was meant to one short idea apart of a DVD( as I said earlier).
Courtney: Thank you very much for you for comments and complements. I love some of your ideas.
Thanks for watching and I will post when the rest are uploaded or you can check in about two weeks they will be done.

regards to all,

Josh