Commercial Made With Vegas

jrazz wrote on 11/16/2007, 1:50 PM
So, on a whim, my brother and I filmed a commercial for a contest that Aquafresh is putting on. It was shot in 2 hours and it was extremely hard to get 16 minutes worth of footage compressed down to 30 seconds. Anyways, we decided to film this commercial and submit it and as Vic Milt would say, "we just got out there and shot it". Once I got back into town (it was shot in his dorm room in Nashville) I cut and cut and cut and cut and cut (did I mention that 30 seconds is extremely difficult to fit a complete idea into?)... and finally I had a spot to upload to the contest.

The lighting was less than ideal and the shots were not perfect and I could go on and on about the flaws, but I have a favor to ask... will you just give it a look?

The more people who watch it, the more of a chance I have of winning.

Here is the link to my site where I have embedded it. Thanks guys.

Aquafresh Drip

Edit: Aquafresh Drip: The Revelation
This is the second commercial we submitted. It ties into the first. Please take 30 seconds and watch it. Thanks.

j razz

Comments

farss wrote on 11/16/2007, 2:53 PM
I guess you don't need me to tell you the soundtrack could have used some more work?

Apart from that, great idea. The visuals are fine. Sure better lighting would have sold it better but what the heck, not a show stopper. The one thing that would be I think easily fixed is the audio at the beginning. Turn the drip FX down and add something under it to tie it all together.

Bob.
jrazz wrote on 11/16/2007, 3:19 PM
Wait til you the second we made. It is not posted yet, but once it is I will post a link to it as well. All I did on that one was throw a rendition of one of the Cinescore themes under it and encoded. I wish I had more time to work on things like this as it was fun, but I am still backed up with some work from July that I need to finish. I find stuff like this challenging and fun.

We only used the light of the room and one desk lamp for lighting.

Thanks for taking the time to comment Bob.

j razz
auggybendoggy wrote on 11/16/2007, 3:44 PM
sound rx reek. no offense

also it looks like the two hours was spend cleaning the bath room
hahahah kidding

I did not care for it as it lacks real vehicle of communicating the msg.
I tend to think it needs a bit of dialouge, cause it's a bit boring.
please dont think I'm saying I could do better, I cant.


Aug
rmack350 wrote on 11/16/2007, 6:16 PM
I liked it. The idea surpasses any flaws you might think it has, and it's very simple. Good job!

If you wanted more out of it I'd say maybe a little more energetic cutting. And people like to see other people, I think, so maybe show a little more performance from your bro', but the simplicity is really good.

Rob Mack
rmack350 wrote on 11/16/2007, 6:24 PM
I call it sedate, not really boring. But we're on the same page.

The thing about the dripping sound is that it's really front and center but it doesn't get used. You know how, for example, you see a gun in the first act of a play and you assume someone will get shot eventually. You could still use the sound, but pull it way back so that it's just part of the whole mess and the drip gets cleaned up along with everything else.

But don't take any of this to heart. I'm meandering.

Rob
jrazz wrote on 11/16/2007, 9:16 PM
Guys,

Thanks for the comments. I don't really care if they are critical or not as I just like to have the feedback so I can get better. Let'em fly if they are helpful.

This was my first attempt at a 30 second spot and it was on a whim, but regardless we had fun making it, my brother got a clean room out of the deal and we have a chance at winning so all in all, I think it was a positive experience.

As for my brother, neither he or myself are actors :) but you will see more of him in the second follow up commercial. Like I said, it is hard to fit a complete idea in 30 seconds... I have gained respect for Vic Milt and others who have to come up with 30 second spots.

Thanks again for the comments and taking a look.

j razz
farss wrote on 11/16/2007, 9:34 PM
I think the amount of work that goes into most TVCs is seriously underestimated. Not just the shoot, that's the bit we think about because it the sexy bit with lights and cameras and talent. It's the planning before the shoot and the amount of work in post that gets overlooked.

Bob.
deusx wrote on 11/16/2007, 10:29 PM
>>>>I think the amount of work that goes into most TVCs is seriously underestimated. Not just the shoot, that's the bit we think about because it the sexy bit with lights and cameras and talent. It's the planning before the shoot and the amount of work in post that gets overlooked.<<<

well, when you have 100 people and million dollar budgets working on those 30 seconds ( as you do with larger corporations ) , can't really be impressed by most of them.
It's really a waste of resources and money most of the time.
FrigidNDEditing wrote on 11/16/2007, 10:46 PM
it's no longer available :( not sure why.

I think it's funny though that so many of those entries are going to be disqualified because people just didn't spend 5 min. to browse the freakin rules. I mean really. some of those files are over 30 seconds and a good many use music that I'm almost CERTAIN there are no releases for (clearly called for both of these requirements to qualify in the rules). Just seems like people just need to get their head in the game sometimes, but I'm tempted to enter if I can think of something good, (wouldn't mind 10K, don't really care about going to the shoot of a commercial, but the money would take care of my new camera this year :).

Dave
rmack350 wrote on 11/17/2007, 1:37 AM
There can be such a thing as too much polish. I kind of think that contests like this are looking for something that works well on Youtube and can be passed around to get a bit of buzz in that demographic. So really a rough video with a good idea is probably ideal.

We just did something for one of our clients that ought to have looked more like this. What we did was too slick. They wanted something that looked like an average joe made it.

I think you're doing the right thing.

Rob
jrazz wrote on 11/17/2007, 7:49 AM
Dave,

I could access the link I provided above and it played just fine. I wonder what the problem was?

Anyways, I watched a few others (out of temptation) and saw that several used songs that they had no rights for and that immediately eliminates them from moving further in the contest as you said.

Well, give mine a shot again.

Rob,

You are right in that they are just looking for an idea and they expect something from an "average joe". Of course, I would like to exceed that and make mine stand out but on a whim, nothing was really planned but I think the idea was good (I just couldn't fit it all in 30 seconds).

j razz
CClub wrote on 11/17/2007, 8:44 AM
Jrazz,
I like the concept a lot. The only thing I couldn't get past -- and it's only my personal opinion here -- was the washcloth with the boogers [edit] or whatever it was that might make it difficult to sell the commercial.
JJKizak wrote on 11/17/2007, 9:07 AM
I liked it. However I would have used a chimp with big teeth and a big fat toothbrush. I also like chimps.
JJK
CVM wrote on 11/17/2007, 7:27 PM
Here's an idea for anyone who's looking to do a commercial 'on a whim.' Take notice of real TV commercials and copy them. Obviously change it up, but basically see what constitutes a real commercial, and emulate the look, feel, and emotion.

I hate being critical, but the spot really wasn't really good at all. Why did you only spend two hours? Imagine if you spent four! I was turned off by the nasty rag, the drip, and the mohawk. Nothing gelled... nothing fit... and it was predictable. Hey, I know, it was your first spot, and I give you props for even making one... but how fufilled were you when you finished? Did you look at it and say, 'This is great!' I don't think so. A quick word about marketing... don't apologize before we even see the spot... SELL IT TO US! You'd be surprised how many tough customers I've sold by having an immense amount of excitement and enthusiasm... it's contagious for the client.
jrazz wrote on 11/17/2007, 8:54 PM
...but how fufilled were you when you finished? Did you look at it and say, 'This is great!'

I was just excited that I was able to spend some time with my brother. I see him maybe once a year... it was just good to be able to spend some time with him.

My goal was to get across an idea. Yes, I would have liked to of sunk a lot of time and some more money into it but that was not an option. There are a lot of would haves and should haves but when it comes down to it, I don't have the time to invest in a project like this when I have paying jobs still waiting to be completed. Plus, my intention was never to go there and film something; my intention was to go and spend some time with my brother... so to answer your question, yes. Yes, I did say, "This is great". It was great to be able to bond some with my ten years the younger brother.

I do appreciate your advice though.

jjkizak,

I laughed out loud when I read your comment. Thanks for sharing.

CClub,

My brother said it was rust stains from cleaning around the shower handles.

j razz
jrazz wrote on 11/20/2007, 1:17 PM
Here is part II of the Aquafresh Drip commercial. I also added it to the first post up top.

Aquafresh Drip: The Revelation
This is the second commercial we submitted. It ties into the first. Please take 30 seconds and watch it. Thanks.

j razz