OT: Can sb in Vancouver confirm if this is real?

Coursedesign wrote on 12/24/2008, 12:11 PM
This Craigslist ad makes me wonder if it's for real. But it could be...

Any Vancouverians here in the know?

All the tenants I interview aren't good enough (Broadway and Commercial)

Reply to: pers-964514051@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2008-12-19, 6:05PM PST

I am a born again Christian. Why is this a problem for people????! I have a house that's MINE and I PAID FOR IT. I also have a basement apartment for rent. It's a great space for I'm charing very little for it, $480 monthly, for the right tenant. I know it's ILLEGAL to require a Christian in the apartment, against the human rights. That's why I NEVER put this in my ad. Why then does it keep getting taken down?

HERE IS THE AD I POSTED, AND THE AD THAT KEEPS GETTING REMOVED:

Available Immediately – Broadway and Commercial – Showing Saturday and Sunday – Email for directions and additional information.

What kind of apartment is it?

• One bedroom basement apartment with separate entrance
• Tastefully decorated with modern décor
• Approximately 650 square feet
• There is even a window! Security bars installed for your safety and to prevent unauthorized activity
• Closed circuit camera installed for security and safety. One in your suite, one at the entrance, and one in the exercise yard

Rent:
• $480.00 per month
• First month’s rent + ½ month security deposit due at move in
• Small pet allowed with approval and payment of additional ½ month pet damage deposit
• One year lease permitted, option to renew lease at end of the term with no increase in rent
• LANDLORD’S SPECIAL! Move in before January 1st and don’t pay for the remainder of December! That’s significant savings.

Included in the rent:

• Electricity
• Heat – Maintained at 21 degrees with lock box to prevent unauthorized tampering. Additional heating available for $20.00 per extra degree of heating per month. You may not use your oven to heat the apartment. If you do, you will be fined $50.00 per occurrence.
• Air conditioning – Maintained at 25 degrees during the summer with lock box to prevent extra cooling from being dispensed. Additional cooling for sale for $20.00 per degree of cooling requested per month.
• 25" Zenith color television set with basic cable service - INCLUDED IN RENT!
• Wireless internet (with content filter applied to block forbidden/immoral websites) - INCLUDED IN RENT!
• Provision of coin laundry services - You will have your own personal coin laundry washer and dryer machines. Washers and dryers are paid using a token system. Tokens can be purchased through the landlord. Washer tokens cost $4.15 each and dryer tokens cost $3.60 each. You are not allowed to use foreign
currency or slugs in the washer and dryer. Violators will be fined $100.00 per infraction.

About us: (Landlords)

We are conservative, bible believing, God-fearing, born again, evangelical Christians. We interpret the bible literally in every way possible. We live a strict moral code and observe God’s laws in our everyday life. My wife stays at home and teaches our home-schooled children. I work as a pastor at a local congregation and am active in the faith community.

About you: (Tenant)

• You are employed
• You do not participate in lascivious deviant sexual behavior
• You do not choose alternative lifestyles as your lifestyle
• You do not have any criminal history
• You must have excellent character references
• You do not smoke, drink or take drugs. Mandatory drug screening required.


Additional Rules/Conditions:

CLEANLINESS: You are responsible for the cleanliness and orderliness of
your apartment. Beds are to be made before leaving your suite,
countertops must be wiped down, and you must remove all trash. Upon
inspection, if the tenant's basement suite is not clean, the cost of
cleaning services plus a fine of $100.00 will be levied.
LIGHTS: The lights in your basement suite and in the day room are not to
be tampered with. If a light needs repair, report the condition to the
Landlord.
WAKE-UP: Wake up will be at 5:30am each morning. All ceiling lights in
the suite will be turned on automatically.
LIGHTS OUT: Ceiling lights in the suite will be turned off at 11:30pm.
CONTRABAND: The following items are considered contraband – alcohol, illegal drugs, tobacco, weapons, lock picking equipment. If any contraband is discovered to be in your possession, you will be subject to a minimum $1,000.00 fine. In addition, your items will be confiscated permanently. Second offense – you will be evicted without notice. A bailiff will escort you and your belongings off the premises. Your security deposit will not be returned.
SMOKING: The basement suite is non-smoking. Anyone in possession of
tobacco products of any kind or any lighter or matches, will have their
contraband items confiscated and will be fined $100.00.
INSPECTIONS: The Landlord will conduct unannounced inspections to ensure
that these rules and regulations are being followed.
VISITATION: Visitation periods will be on Saturdays and Sundays from
1:00 p.m. until 3:00 p.m. All visitors and their vehicles are subject
to search while on landlord property. Refusal to allow a search can
result in their being barred from all future visitation privileges. All
visitors must sign the Visitor's Log. Unauthorized visitors will be
escorted from the property, and the tenant will be fined $250.00.
I.D. BRACELETS: Each tenant will be issued an I.D. bracelet with his/her
photograph. It must be worn at all times. If you lose your I.D.
bracelet or it is broken, you will be required to purchase a new one at
the nominal cost of $5.00.
EXERCISE YARD: The tenant will have access to the exercise yard in the
area to the back of the property for 2 hours per day from 4:00 pm to
6:00 pm. The tenant is not allowed to bring any personal property to
the exercise yard. Once the tenant leaves the exercise yard on a
particular day, he or she may not return. No boisterous behavior is
allowed in the exercise yard. There is no smoking allowed in the
exercise yard. Minimum fine for exercise yard infractions is $50.00.

Location: Broadway and Commercial
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 964514051

Comments

John_Cline wrote on 12/24/2008, 2:09 PM
Wow, there are a bunch of reasons that I couldn't live there.
TheHappyFriar wrote on 12/24/2008, 2:35 PM
We are conservative, bible believing, God-fearing, born again, evangelical Christians. We interpret the bible literally in every way possible. We live a strict moral code and observe God’s laws in our everyday life.

it says nothing about locking out the heating/cooling in there! :D Didn't Jesus say "Judge not, that ye be not judged" (matt 7:1) But they're sinners no less! "For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God" (Romans 3:22-24)

more like they sound like pricks. If they don't want people they don't like there then they shouldn't rent. That's what my pastor would say! Problem solved!

but man... what a list. Who'd want that kind of thing! People screw up all the time (see above!)

EDIT: and why do they allow cable? What about the stuff that's on there? That's ok but HBO isn't? I don't recall FOX or CBS running many moral shows (I haven't had TV for 6 months so I'm not sure, but I'm betting they didn't add any!). :D
Chienworks wrote on 12/24/2008, 3:44 PM
I dunno about Vancouver, but there are more than a few things in there that wouldn't be legal in New York. We have a pretty sizable list of tenant rights that are guaranteed by law. Unannounced inspections, id bracelets, wakeup and lights-out times would all be out. While a landlord can require orderly conduct and respect for other people and property, they cannot require any specific sexual behavior or lifestyle and certainly can't require drug screening. I also suspect that many of the fines listed wouldn't pass scrutiny either. Vancouver probably has some similar tenants rights as well.

It sounds a lot more like a halfway house than an apartment. Nobody in their right mind would agree to all that voluntarily. Heck, the biggest deal killer for me is the heat set at 21. I'd be roasting and probably have the windows cracked open all winter.
farss wrote on 12/24/2008, 3:49 PM
Sounds more like an ad for a prison cell.
Exercise yard?
It's a joke right?

Bob.
Chienworks wrote on 12/24/2008, 3:59 PM
Oh, and "The tenant is not allowed to bring any personal property to the exercise yard." ... So that means that to follow their rules the tenant would have to go exercise in the nude? I have a hard time believing they would want that.
Cheno wrote on 12/24/2008, 4:12 PM
"Sounds more like an ad for a prison cell."

I was going to say the same thing, Bob. Although prison isn't as strict. ;)
ushere wrote on 12/24/2008, 4:26 PM
pity poor mary and joesph if they were the inn's proprietors.....
DrLumen wrote on 12/24/2008, 5:27 PM
"It rubs the lotion on its skin. It does this whenever it's told."

intel i-4790k / Asus Z97 Pro / 32GB Crucial RAM / Nvidia GTX 560Ti / 500GB Samsung SSD / 256 GB Samsung SSD / 2-WDC 4TB Black HDD's / 2-WDC 1TB HDD's / 2-HP 23" Monitors / Various MIDI gear, controllers and audio interfaces

Coursedesign wrote on 12/24/2008, 6:21 PM
Have you had too much eggnog?

???

DrLumen wrote on 12/28/2008, 11:51 PM
I guess it was more obscure than I thought...

It's a quote from "Silence of the Lambs" when the girl is down in the well... It's just reminded me of that scene considering the lights and being underground with a window with bars, etc.

intel i-4790k / Asus Z97 Pro / 32GB Crucial RAM / Nvidia GTX 560Ti / 500GB Samsung SSD / 256 GB Samsung SSD / 2-WDC 4TB Black HDD's / 2-WDC 1TB HDD's / 2-HP 23" Monitors / Various MIDI gear, controllers and audio interfaces

Rory Cooper wrote on 12/29/2008, 12:41 AM
He said it himself

He observes Gods laws

Especially Gods law on Love this he observes from far far away
FilmingPhotoGuy wrote on 12/29/2008, 5:02 AM
Hey! Hang on a minute, this is an application ad for the Vatican City. Broadway and Spacious is the road.....