Thanks Omar I would like to ask though why do you think this is a trailer? Actually that is quite flattering, as a Trailer is full of the Film Highlights and acts as an advertisement to get people to tune in.. Its actually an unfinished opening to a potential film to actually think People may be looking at this a nine minute film in Trailer terms, is indeed a Compliment ;} There are a few Films that start this way Non stop Action...Thank you again...You have given me encouragement..I guess you could look at any James Bond Opening and call that a Trailer in the terms perhaps you are looking at.. I have actually got a 1h 30m Script that if done right could be VERY Entertaining....

Mark,

I just took a look at Tigger Street. Yeah, I guess that's a film festival although I was thinking more of a real physical festival with real audiences and projection and popcorn and stuff.

Look, the film isn't ready. Could it be ready for some festival? Sure, but you'll have to accept that you're going to show it to other people and that they aren't going to know anything about the film or the story, which is largely still in your head at this point.

For real festivals, they show everything to a screening committee and those people decide what will get in and maybe even decide on the programming. They'll have lots of stuff to watch and they may meet their quota without picking your film. They aren't stupid and they may have really good reasons to pass on your film. Rejection is part of festivals so you're going to have to deal with it.

Go ahead and send it to online festivals and see what happens.

Now, here's the main problem I see. Almost all of the movie is still in your head and not on the screen. You see it, no one else here does. So, it needs more work-and not on the FX. Throw out the music, voiceover, and FX for now and work on the story.

Second, you have some ideas about style but they are only barely coming across. Is it like a graphical novel? Maybe, vaguely, now that you mention it. You need to be more definite about that sort of thing before you shoot more. Personally, after watching the whole thing, it's mainly an intro movie to a video game like Diablo or Myth. There just isn't enough there for it to stand on it's own.

It isn't ready for a festival in a theater yet. Could it be? Maybe, but from the sounds of your responses maybe you personally aren't ready to get the movie ready.

If people are looking at your clip and being confused, take it seriously. People shouldn't be distracted by this stuff and you shouldn't be sitting here explaining it to people and saying "Well, Duh! isn't it obvious that...blah, blah, blah?". You're making excuses and getting mad because people aren't "getting it" but I have to tell you that if people here don't "get it" no one else will either.

Before you spend a dime on additional shooting, go back and work on the script, storyboard it, make shot lists, and do run-throughs with real people before shooting. Do it all with still photos if you like.

Rob Mack

Mark, oh wow sorry, I think someone above somewhere was referring to it as a trailer so I went into it with that in mind. Now, forget what i said about length and cuts then :)

Now that I know it's not, it's even better! All of the holes that are missing in the plot (people kept asking about) I'm sure will unravel throughout the film, once you finally complete it since you mentioned it was just an opening. If this is an opening it's certainly ok to me for the viewer to not know exactly what's going on in the beginning; tell the viewer to sit back relax and watch the whole darn film! I think what happens in the opening is pretty clear. As far as all the why's and how's, we'll find out as the story develops.

I'll tell you I, personally, am not crazy about science fiction and even I'm very interested in seeing the movie beyond this opening because it has engaged me; that's pretty good then!

I watched it again, now knowing it wasn't a trailer and I'm still fascinated by that first scene with the guy, girl and alien! It seems that the alien gets in the guy's head and has him kill the lady all due to that amulet, or he is actually associated with the alien in the first place. This will be more clear when the story is developed obviously.

A few things I noticed:
I don't know how the rest of the movie will develop but you might need some more breaks between the action scenes and slow some parts down with dialogue that tells a little more about what's going on; I guess this will be different when it is at the length of a feature film.

Another thing I noticed was the sound effect when the devilish characters were haunting the man in the car, there was like a chainsaw sound. If this is what you intended, cool. If not, the sound makes me think they are eating into the car...

finally, the voiceover of the scroll was very unaudible to me. he should read the entire thing slower and more clear cause I REALLY want to know what he says now because its important to the plot it seems.

GOOD LUCK with the rest Mark!!

I'm downloading the movie at this point, so I'll leave some feedback once I have it in my computer.

However, I do have to say that ALL the feedbacks that you have received are whitin the basic norms of politeness, and that I do not understand your deffensive, agressive and arrogant attitude, specially towards Jay, that is wayyy out of line.

You are talking about TriggerStreet....well TRY IT!!! ......but be prepared with the feedback you will get there!! I bet you won't be able to handle it AT ALL.

I'll post later about the clip.

Man.........

I think it can work as a portfolio of what you can do with the computer...but, as a filmmaker, I'm sorry......you just don't have it:

As a clip of a scene (is this what it is, right?), it is just plain dreadful to watch. Unfortunately, you don't even have the strange appeal of Ed Wood to grab the attention of your audience.

On the other hand, tt does not even work as a trailer (just to say something, because I don't know what it is, really)

Not only there is a lack of plot, but also narration is not part of your vocabulary. You don't create anticipation, release....tension......There are no beats, there is no SCENE!

Even the chase part is completely dull.

It is badly acted and badly directed.

Man, if you need someone running, choose at least somenone who can actually run.

Minor things that would not be as important if you had a good script and good actors: Inconsistent lighting. The effects are ok. Nothing out of this world. The music is cheesy, sometimes randomly used.

The best: The sound fx and sound mixing.

And man, get real, please..your movie sucks, don't make me lie to you...

You know, filmmaking is tough, and it is time that someone speaks to you clearly. I think Jay was too nice with you actually.

Take what you have learn from this project and move to the next one. I know you must have put a lot of effort into this, like many other filmmakers in their attempts...but hey! that's the way it works.

Aspenv

Man.........

I think it can work as a portfolio of what you can do with the computer...but, as a filmmaker, I'm sorry......you just don't have it:

As a clip of a scene (is this what it is, right?), it is just plain dreadful to watch. Unfortunately, you don't even have the strange appeal of Ed Wood to grab the attention of your audience.

>>>WHAT are you on about? Clip of a scene? <<<

On the other hand, tt does not even work as a trailer (just to say something, because I don't know what it is, really)

>>>> Yeah right<<<

Not only there is a lack of plot, but also narration is not part of your vocabulary. You don't create anticipation, release....tension......There are no beats, there is no SCENE!

>>>Yes it was just a blank Picture..This is not a review its a P**SS TAKE<<<

Even the chase part is completely dull.

>>wELL AT Least you have a picture now<<<

It is badly acted and badly directed.

Man, if you need someone running, choose at least somenone who can actually run.<<<<

What Kind of CRAP Comment is that Its a Film and the character is running..Thats pathetic..

>>>Minor things that would not be as important if you had a good script and good actors: Inconsistent lighting. The effects are ok. Nothing out of this world. The music is cheesy, sometimes randomly used. <<<

Yes perhaps BUT I cant afford a Top Notch Composer...only Acid sorry if my acid skills are not as good as yours but then Im not Musicly gifted and your not either...

>>The best: The sound fx and sound mixing.<<<

Yeah dont knock Acid to much..

>>>>And man, get real, please..your movie sucks, don't make me lie to you...<<<

Well thanks for watching I wont make you lie.. Only you can do that

>>>You know, filmmaking is tough, and it is time that someone speaks to you clearly. I think Jay was too nice with you actually.<<<

What like this Review... Thanks for the Clarity and helpfull comments..

>>>Take what you have learn from this project and move to the next one. I know you must have put a lot of effort into this, like many other filmmakers in their attempts...but hey! that's the way it works<<<

Actually not a bad finishing comment If it were not tied in with the rest..

You know sony you really should keep an eye on Posters using dual identities for this kind of stuff.. A thinly disguised attack and I bet I know by who and no Not Jay..I think this breaks many terms and conditions

Sorry to say that in real life, you have to learn to deal with many criticisms; it seems you are not taking them well... hope you learn something.

>>>Sorry to say that in real life, you have to learn to deal with many criticisms; it seems you are not taking them well... hope you learn something.<<<

Yes I learnt that some people like to support others in crapping on your work Did you watch the Film Arks00.. There are already a good few posters showing the gang Mentality in support EVEN Before watching the Film.. Critism I can take..Bullying and put downs to promote others is really a separate issue but being used to good effect here To say that you cant spot the big and obvious flaws in these crits is just another aspect of the gang mentality of course this Forum has Plumbed to new lows and Im not just talking about me Im not defending jUST My Film But also the right to openly debate and freedom from Harrassment here.. There have to be changes and time to make a stand before this Forum is Completely finished...

Mark,

You really should just hold your nose and submit to some sort of festivals. Find something really inexpensive and just try it out. Even if you don't get accepted for a screening you'll still learn something from it.

Just don't go after them like you're going after people here. Believe me, festival organizers get plenty of crackpots who are serial submitters. Keep your record clean if you intend to ever submit a second video.

Rob Mack

>>>>Mark,

You really should just hold your nose and submit to some sort of festivals. Find something really inexpensive and just try it out. Even if you don't get accepted for a screening you'll still learn something from it.

Just don't go after them like you're going after people here. Believe me, festival organizers get plenty of crackpots who are serial submitters. Keep your record clean if you intend to ever submit a second video.

Rob Mack<<<<

Rob dont worry about me I know the score I would expect the putdowns and insults in a festival and thats fine...However this is not a Festival this is a forum about Vegas.. I have learnt much stuff here... I asked what members think about me entering my potential film into a festival..THIS was not an open day for certain predictable people to openly crap on my film then tell me I cant take critisism..< This Is an Attempt at Justification for bad Behaviour...Has this Forum gone so badly wrong that insulting people that upset a member of the in crowd has to be drubbed in Public.. With each gang member taking a turn to have a kick... I expect the Festivals to be a certain way because its survival and your in competition...I dont agree with this Behaviour but I Know its part and Parcel.. Thats one of the reasons for coming here first..The thing is although I can take the slings and arrows.. This Forum has Deteriorated ..

Mark, Can you give us an example (or a few) of the kind of replies you were expecting? If YOU were to review your project, what would you have said?
I'm just curious as to what your expectations would be and how you would have handled putting ideas out there.

>>>Mark, Can you give us an example (or a few) of the kind of replies you were expecting? If YOU were to review your project, what would you have said?
I'm just curious as to what your expectations would be and how you would have handled putting ideas out there.<<

Interesting question you want me to review my own film.. WELL First off I think the Film Is well edited and some really well integrated FX.. The Soundtrack is actually very Professional, Although limited by the encoding process.. The Gargoyle style aliens could be made using a better Model.. Perhaps this is something you could do in a new Version.. Budgetry allowances possibly apply here.. The car could be perhaps more Theatricly chosen.. I agree that some scenes could have the cast recalled so that some more scenes could be added.. Also some very nice slow and fast motions play with time and space which is in keeping also as tHE OPENING STYLE Is so Action Orientated I would like to see some more stunts Perhaps explosions.... The Acting is obviously for a more settled time in the film SO no comments needed... The Alien itself could be more lifelike perhaps some time spent using an actor with certain movements that are more Alien..The Amulet itself could be more Alien... actually the Film is very well paced with action coming fairly rapidly this helps with the low Budget..Also the scene where the Alien is kneeling by the girl this could have a scene with the man being thrown and perhaps firing the gun from a lying position...I Realise of course it depends on what kind of Festival you want to show this at for the lower festivals its fine and obviously cost and time have to be weighed by the needs If Higher festivals are the Goal Then this review is quite apropriate...Perhaps list of recomended Festivals suited to this film...

Just a few comments I may give myself and in no Particular order...

I would take notes and I already did as I said in the intro I may depending on the comments recall the cast and add refine...

Showing the Film here served two purposes 1) to Showcase my work and it is a work in Progress but 2) to see if there were ideas or help on offer to offer guidance in areas I my have missed to talk about this in a constructive manner as an aid to further developement...

Mark, You have made more of this than need be. If you could have digested Jay's comments on your film and said wow I didn't think of that, good idea, Thanks, I will keep that in mind.
Instead you get your pity party hat on and took the defense.

Jay even tried to keep things lite with:
I liked your Scrooge bit a lot better.
"John, you're right. I had forgotten about that. That was a very well done piece indeed!"

With that in mind it doesn't appear Jay's out for blood to me.
I have seen you critque video clips on Kelly's site and nobody has blew up on you.
Your use to folks saying "Oh Mark outstanding job how did you do that? " have you noticed as of yet nobody has made a reply on your post over there. Why? Then you post it here and in this forum if your looking for answers and opinions here you'll get em. (quick) So... if you can't handle the answer... Don't ask the question.
I'm truly sorry that you don't get it.
JImmy


Edit:Showing the Film here served two purposes 1) to Showcase my work and it is a work in Progress but 2) to see if there were ideas or help on offer to offer guidance in areas I my have missed to talk about this in a constructive manner as an aid to further developement...

Ditto: See Jay's first post

Mark, You have made more of this than need be. If you could have digested Jay's comments on your film and said wow I didn't think of that, good idea, Thanks, I will keep that in mind.
Instead you get your pity party hat on and took the defense.

WHEN SOMEONE CRAPS ON YOU THATS WHAT YOU DO GET ALL DEFENSIVE

Jay even tried to keep things lite with:
I liked your Scrooge bit a lot better.
"John, you're right. I had forgotten about that. That was a very well done piece indeed!"

HE WAS REPLYING TO JOHN

With that in mind it doesn't appear Jay's out for blood to me.
I have seen you critque video clips on Kelly's site and nobody has blew up on you.

PERHAPS THATS BECAUSE THEY LIKE MY WORK..

Your use to folks saying "Oh Mark outstanding job how did you do that? " have you noticed as of yet nobody has made a reply on your post over there. Why?

WHAT A PETTY COMMENT

Then you post it here and in this forum if your looking for answers and opinions here you'll get em. (quick) So... if you can't handle the answer... Don't ask the question.

ANSWERS AND OPINIONS ARE NOT CRAPPING ON PEOPLES WORK

I'm truly sorry that you don't get it.

BUT I DO GET IT JIMMY ONLY TOO WELL PERHAPS SOME HERE ARE USED TO CRAPPING ON PEOPLE AND GETTING AWAY WITH IT SORRY IF I WONT LIE DOWN AND TAKE MY DRUBBING

JImmy

Ok, We'll just leave it at that !

Jimmy

Festivals will be picky for a variety of reasons. Even after culling out things they just don't like, it's often the case that there just aren't enough program slots for everything that is at least acceptable.

Rob Mack

I know some people like to keep things quite - but what 3D? Software did you use for the short lighting effect at the beggining of the film? ("A Film By" - was the on screen text). I really enjoyed it - it looked great!

Thanks P:)

or you could just ignore what everyone is saying in this forum... You are not forced to read this. If it is bothering you that much, f' it; dont post anymore. simple solution really...

Shifter thanks :) Pleased you liked it ! That effect was Created in After Effects using a Plugin called Dragonfly..

Mark, I also have submitted a few things for "critique", and lets face it, no one really likes criticism. But that's how you learn, buddy....

Good point. The one thing that I learned in my first film class in college was how to deal with critiques. If someone takes the time to watch it and comment on it, shut up and listen, and then say thank you -- no matter how much of a personal attack you think it is. (Then curse them later for not seeing it like you do...)

As a matter of fact, I took 2 seconds and googled "how to take critiques." This next part is lifted from here: http://www.geocities.com/charlottedillon2000/CritiqueArticle.html

**Receive Criticism Gracefully

Before you read over any critique someone has given you, take out your tough skin suit and slip it on. I know our work is our baby, but you've asked for the opinions of others, so you're getting them, good and bad. It's not going to be any easier when it's from a contest judge, an editor or agent, or a
reader or reviewer, so you might as well learn to shrug off what you don't like or agree with now. It'll save you some time later and you'll be much happier in the long run.

We all have different likes and dislikes, and since a critique is only an opinion, you don't have to agree with it. Look through the whole critique and take what you find helpful and don't worry over the rest. Sometimes you can pick out something useful even from the worst critique. If you don't agree with something, before you just toss it, put it aside for a few days and then look at it again after you have time to get over the sting. You might find that the critique was at least a little right. Also, if more than
one person points out the same thing, even if you don't agree, you might owe it to yourself, and your work, to take another look at it.

In the end, the wonderful thing is, it's your work, your call, so you get to change what you want and toss what you don't agree with. Never let someone write your story for you. But never write thinking your words are gold and you're the only one right. If so, then you don't need any critiques.

I like this, jrkrepner.
Good stuff. Almost worth being a sticky for the forum.
Well... almost ;-)